This article was first published in eMessenger in April 2019.
People are essentially social beings. We group together with family and friends and share our lives with them. We talk about our lives: what we had for dinner, what we did today, what annoyed us and what enriched us. It seems to be something we need to do.
This was clearly seen after the terrorist attacks in Christchurch. People came together to mourn and the outpouring of love crossed the normal cultural, religious and race boundaries. We shared strong emotions - the horror and disbelief of what happened and the grief. We grieved not only for the people that had died but a loss of innocence. Muslim men set up deckchairs in Christchurch and invited people to simply sit and chat. People shared their stories and precious bonds were formed. Sociologists talk of our mirror neurons and how through talking and listening we trigger our mirror neurons and we can create permanent, positive change in people and society as a whole.
We are social beings - our brains are wired for social connection and there are advantages for this. Dependence, cooperation and collaboration with each other increases our ability to survive in harsh environments in the past and continue to do so today.
Source: Emma Seppala, Ph.D, https://emmaseppala.com/connect-thrive-infographic/
Social connection is a person’s subjective feelings of being understood and connected to others. Research has shown that social connection is a greater determinant to health than obesity, smoking and high blood pressure. So having friends you can talk to and support you can boost your mental health, help you live longer and improve your quality of life. Isolation, loneliness and the lack of social connection has a negative effect on our health and wellbeing.
Source: Emma Seppala, Ph.D, https://emmaseppala.com/connect-thrive-infographic/
Reported rates of loneliness, social isolation and alienation are rising rapidly in Aotearoa New Zealand with the highest rates of loneliness reported in the 15 – 24 age group.[1] Loneliness is associated with poor wellbeing and is most prevalent in our vulnerable groups in society – these are the disabled, recent migrants, low income households, people who are unemployed, one parent households, people who are disabled, and the rural elderly.[2]
Neighbours Day Aotearoa encourages social connection. It creates opportunities for people to meet, share and interact with others. Neighbours Day was celebrated around Aotearoa New Zealand in many Methodist parishes and missions. Here are some of the ways it was celebrated: there was a free neighbourhood BBQ at New Brighton Union Church with sausages, hash browns and milk shakes, hosted by the Christchurch Methodist Mission Community Team; Beckenham Methodist Church held a Fair & Fun Day; the Housing First team held a sausage sizzle with Te Whare Roimata in Stanmore Road where they offered free sausages and homemade soup to the locals; and Christchurch Methodist Mission hosted a get together with their neighbours.
Sausage sizzle with the Housing First team at Te Whare Roimata
Splice brought Auckland City the “Check it Out” Human Library with a diverse group of Auckland City goers as “Human Books” ready for people to walk up to and check out for 20 minute eye-opening conversations in the City Centre Library Courtyard. The objective was to raise awareness for Neighbour’s day by breaking down barriers and activate the city centre to create meaningful interactions, share stories and promote connection between neighbours.
Human books at the Auckland City Library
If you are wondering how to increase your social connection, especially if you are an introvert, here are some suggestions.
Source: Emma Seppala, Ph.D, https://emmaseppala.com/connect-thrive-infographic/
So get connected, and live longer, healthier and happier lives.
Carol Barron, Methodist Alliance National Coordinator, Carol@MethodistAlliance.org.nz
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